One Week Out!

King Lear: Day 13

Crunch time! As we started finishing up the final scene of the show tonight, it was very apparent that the entire cast was completely aware of the fact that we have one week left. There was a general sense of intensity and focus as we moved through the full run-through. Picking up cues and keeping energy high was much easier with everyone feeding off each other and with the percussion included. What a difference a set makes. Being able to see your environment is indispensible. Props, costumes and lighting, coupled with our intensified energy level made for a wonderfully creative environment and a lot of strong choices.

I had a discussion with several of the other cast members about other characters in a show informing us of our own. Shakespeare gives us wonderful clues of who we are in our own text but it is through other characters that we may find the biggest clues. In life, it is those around us that inform us to ourselves and hold the mirror up so we can see the impact we have on the world around us. It is the same on stage and all these avenues should be explored before setting a scene. Through reactions, thoughts and feelings articulated in other characters, we can truly get a sense of who we are.

I have come to some strong realizations of my scenes and I am feeling much more confident about my characterizations, having taken into consideration the characters around me. I have also decided that some of my own baggage has gotten in the way of my acceptance of the scene choices and I must move though it. The actor’s ego is a very delicate thing and mine may be even more so since I have not been working for some time. When your confidence isn’t completely there, your defensive instincts tend to take over and make it tough to be accepting of other people’s feelings and choices. In my attempts to be the best actor I can, I have cut myself off from one of the most valuable resources we have as actors, the people around us. Although I connect with all the members of our production on a personal level, I may not have been connecting with them on a professional level, due to my overwhelming desire to be right. It is something I am striving to overcome.

The patience of Mark as both a director and as a teacher has been a very leveling influence for me thus far and I am most thankful that I have had the opportunity to work with him, especially on my first show back. In fact, it is the entire cast’s passion and enthusiasm that has taught me the most about what it is to be an actor. Most of the cast and crew have other jobs and lives to balance and are here because of their pure love of the craft. It always makes me mad when people bitch about spoiled actors and accuse them of being lazy, self centered and self indulgent. I think acting is one of the most underappreciated jobs in the world. We dedicate countless hours of time and energy for very little monetary compensation, all because of the pure joy and love of it. It is my feeling that if we had a few more "actors", the world would be a better place. I think actors are some of the least self centered people in the world. They may be confused with those people because of their self awareness and comfort with becoming or trying to become, someone else entirely. The empathy that takes is nothing short of miraculous and would boast well for any person of influence. Perhaps it should be a mandatory prerequisite for any world leader.